I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
how does that bad decision feel?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
