Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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