I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
