you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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