Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
