why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Ladies don't puke and tell
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
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