Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
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