I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
