oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
