does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
