I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
