i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
