): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
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