is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Come see our sink grown plant.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Randomize
