Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
