I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Randomize
