You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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