if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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