is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
