porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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