Who did Billy Mays play for?
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
