Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
