I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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