you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
