Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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