There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
