no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
