God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Your penis caused this!
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
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