I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
