You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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