I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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