My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
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