i think i have herpe
just one?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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