I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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