Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
