Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
