Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
