i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize