Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
two words: eviction party
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
