you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize