if you like me you must not know who I am
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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