why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
