One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize
