Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
