The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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