The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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