hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
