Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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