hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
