um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
We need to rekindle our bromance
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
